Every Pregnancy Is Different - No Kidding!

My husband and I tried for two years to get pregnant with our first child, and she was definitely worth the wait.  I was blessed to have a beautiful, easy, uncomplicated first pregnancy with my daughter.  (And an extremely easy labor and delivery as well.)  I never experienced morning sickness with her - at all!  I didn't have heartburn, except for maybe one extremely mild night after eating Indian food.  My feet were never swollen.  I didn't experience gestational diabetes.  Only had leg cramps maybe once or twice.  The only discomfort I remember was feeling the ligaments stretching as my uterus expanded - and even that was not bad at all.

My second pregnancy with my son has been quite the opposite, in almost every way.  Matt and I started talking about having more children; when we got lucky around Thanksgiving we were not actively trying to get pregnant, but we weren't preventing it from happening either.  I found out I was preggo with Baby Boy Bailey on Christmas Eve, and started telling family right away.  My mom's reaction was the best; I'll never forget her jumping up and down in my grandmother's kitchen. 

The night before my first OB/GYN appointment, scheduled around 10.5 weeks, I started spotting blood.  I was instantly frightened at the sight (I didn't experience this with my first child) and started crying because I thought I was going to have a miscarriage.  I was able to get in touch with the on-call doc quickly, and he comforted me by saying vaginal spotting/bleeding was common in the first trimester.  He said if my symptoms didn't worsen over night, my doctor would check everything out in the morning.

The next day, at my first appointment, I learned I had a subchorionic hematoma - it's size measuring around 7.5 cm.  I could see the blood clot on the ultrasound monitor.  There was too much blood present to perform a regular pap.  We listened to the baby's heartbeat, it was healthy and strong, a very positive sign.  My doctor said that despite having the blood clot, at least the blood was flowing out vaginally, another positive sign.  We discussed the hematoma a bit more, and then he wanted to see me back in two weeks for another ultrasound and follow-up.

Two weeks later, the ultrasound revealed that my clot was getting smaller.  It measured 6.1 cm.  I was excited, and thought we were on the mend!  As it turns out, that was just the calm before the storm. 

On my third doc visit, two weeks after the second, the clot had grown larger than the first time it was measured.  (I don't even remember the exact measurements now.)  At this point, my doctor had never seen a clot as large as mine, and was growing concerned that it wasn't healing.  He decided to send me to a specialist.  The specialist confirmed everything my local doctor and I had been discussing.  He too, said there was nothing we could do but wait and see what happened.  He also told me he HAD seen larger clots than mine, and that those women went on to have healthy babies.  That was very comforting to know.

Shortly after I saw the specialist, an ultrasound showed that my son's intestines were enlarged - and this sent up a few red flags.  So the specialist ordered some lab work.  Not only were we dealing with a blood clot and all of the complications associated with that, but now we were told our son might have Down Syndrome, Cystic Fibrosis, Spinabifida, or an infection that could possibly cause mental retardation and/or blindness/deafness.  Wowza!  Information overload.  When it rains, it pours.  I nervously waited on lab results, hoping we wouldn't receive any more bad news.  I prayed.  Those prayers were answered.  Blood work came back without indication of any of the above mentioned issues.  Major sigh of relief! 

[I remember the specialist speaking of abortions, and that some women choose to end their pregnancies if results come back positive for any of those issues.  I started tearing up while he spoke.  I knew in my heart I could never end a pregnancy.  Nature would have to take care of that for me.  That would be God's decision, not mine.  My husband is disabled and we learned to deal with that.  If we had a child with special needs, God would give us the tools and skills we needed to raise our special child and help us through that as well.  But prayers were answered - we would not be faced with those additional challenges.]

Almost as soon as I started to relax after receiving cleared lab results, I checked-in to the hospital around midnight one night due to the constant loss of gushing blood... again, I thought I was about to lose my baby.  I lifted more prayers to God, and around 7:00 am I was discharged from the hospital - still pregnant! 

Most recently at 22 weeks pregnant (with a blood clot that now wraps half-way around my placenta), I checked-in to the hospital because my docs thought I might be anemic and need a blood transfusion after a night of more gushing blood and passing blood clots the size of apples in diameter/size of my finger in thickness.  Though my blood levels were low, they were not low enough to need a transfusion.  And once again, my prayers were answered.  (I would have gladly accepted the transfusion if it meant that my baby and I would benefit from the procedure.  But I'm not gonna lie, I was a little concerned about "stranger danger" blood and the risk sometimes associated with transfusions.  No one wants to deal with the rare possibility of hepatitis, HIV, or death due to receiving the wrong blood type.)

Unlike my first pregnancy, my second has been off-the-charts crazy!  Active blood loss daily and the passing of large blood clots every so often was something I never dealt with the first go-around.  Due to the bleeding, I've experienced much cramping.  I've also experienced wicked morning sickness, mad heartburn, and incapacitating gas.  Leg cramps have been more frequent.  Since I'm on bed rest, I'm tired.  Of course, my body is working overtime as well.  But I'm tired of being tired.  I take vitamins 3 times a day instead of once a day.  I drink Boost High Protein shakes on top of eating my meals.  I see two doctors every two weeks - at least.  During my first pregnancy I saw my OB/GYN once a month.

They say every pregnancy is different.  I'm here to say NO KIDDING!  Despite all of the complications, aches, and pains I have to give thanks through it all.  As a bonus, I get to see my baby grow every two weeks.  As a bonus, my faith is stronger in God, as I am more reliant on Him to get me through.  Friends and family are proving to be a valuable support system, and so I've grown closer to those I love.

Baby Boy Bailey and I are not out of the danger zone yet.  But I actively choose not to focus on the negative (as best I can, because let's face it, I'm human and it isn't always easy.)  I celebrate every Monday when I'm another week pregnant.  My short term goal is to make it past 24 weeks preggo (this is the very earliest he would have a fighting chance at survival, and not without major complication) and get to at least 28 weeks preggo.  Anything past that and after the baby is born I'll be doing cartwheels.  I'd love to carry him full term, but we're just gonna take it one day and one week at a time.  By God's grace we have made it this far.  By God's grace we'll make it even further.

Keeping my focus.  Keeping my faith.  Staying positive and giving thanks every step along the way.  Hanging in there.